Tag Archives: mother-daughter relationships

My Review of P.S. I Forgive You: A Broken Legacy by D.G. Kaye

Judith Barrow

P.S. I Forgive You: A Broken Legacy by [Kaye,D.G.]Book Description

Confronted with resurfacing feelings of guilt, D.G. Kaye is tormented by her decision to remain estranged from her dying emotionally abusive mother after resolving to banish her years ago, an event she has shared in her book Conflicted Hearts. In P.S. I Forgive You, Kaye takes us on a compelling heartfelt journey as she seeks to understand the roots of her mother’s narcissism, let go of past hurts, and find forgiveness for both her mother and herself.

After struggling for decades to break free, Kaye has severed the unhealthy ties that bound her to her dominating mother—but now Kaye battles new conflictions, as the guilt she harbours over her decision only increases as the end of her mother’s life draws near. Kaye once again struggles with her conscience and her feelings of being obligated to return to a painful past she thought she left behind.

My Review:

When…

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Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/tech-support/201502/8-types-toxic-patterns-in-mother-daughter-relationships?utm_source=FacebookPost&utm_medium=FBPost&utm_campaign=FBPost

This article focusses on emotional abuse, toxic and disordered mothers inflict on their daughters.

It is sad when you read through insightful articles, and realise you are ticking all the types of toxic behaviours and as you go down the list.

It is important the ‘parentification’ (role reversed) abuse, is highlighted as not commonly known or talked about. It is a deep form of neglect and abuse, rarely understood.

My mother is a deeply toxic, disordered, sick, unwell, intentionally abusive woman. And I have no guilt in saying that anymore. There were more abusive behaviours from my mother, than detailed in this article.

And it is needed to be understood – other types of abuse can cause even greater damage, like physical abuse and sexual abuse/sexual exploitation and often to far greater depths, because they are combined with this emotional abuse.

It is an act of self compassion and healing…

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The Autobiography of my Mother: A Review

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the autobiography of my mother

When Meursault learns of his mother’s death in Albert Camus’ The Stranger, he is apathetic to say the least. It is this strange detachment from emotion Camus explores in his existential search of meaning and existence. Fifty-four years later Jamaica Kincaid’s Xuela is also confronted with the loss of her mother and regards it with Mersault’s similar apathetic detachment as she states:

“My mother died at the moment I was born, and so for my whole life there was nothing standing between myself and eternity; at my back was always a bleak, black wind”

but unlike Meursault, Xuela does not get to attend her mother’s funeral as she is but a newborn when her mother dies. Much like Camus’ interrogation of the existential question of existence, Kincaid explores the affects of a severed bond between mother and child in a theme that stretches far beyond Xuela’s personal story. 

Mother’s are…

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The Joy Luck Club – Amy Tan

Vivian Copeland's Best Books Of All Time

joy luckThis expertly crafted novel, full of rich details about Chinese culture, focuses on four women, best friends, living in San Francisco who form a club to play mahjong. The women are Chinese immigrants; their daughters are American. The book begins with the death of one member, Suyuan Woo, who dies without being reunited with the twin girls she was forced to abandon in China after the second world war. The other women, the “aunties,” ask Suyuan’s American daughter to take her place in the club. At the first meeting, they tell June her long-lost sisters are alive. They’re going to give her money to go to China and fulfill her mother’s greatest wish. They want her to tell her sisters about the mother they never knew. But June feels she never knew her mother, either. All the aunties have wisdom to pass on to their independent American daughters, but the…

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Book Review | Pieces of My Mother by Melissa Cistaro

This is the book club selection for August, in the first of a series of #motherdaughtermemoirs. Let me know what you think in the comments. Recommendations for other mother-daughter memoirs are welcome.

Stories Unfolded

BOOK REVIEW | PIECES OF MY MOTHER

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ABOUT THE BOOK

“This provocative, poignant memoir of a daughter whose mother left her behind by choice begs the question: Are we destined to make the same mistakes as our parents?

One summer, Melissa Cistaro’s mother drove off without explanation Devastated, Melissa and her brothers were left to pick up the pieces, always tormented by the thought: Why did their mother abandon them?

Thirty-five years later, with children of her own, Melissa finds herself in Olympia, Washington, as her mother is dying. After decades of hiding her painful memories, she has just days to find out what happened that summer and confront the fear she could do the same to her kids. But Melissa never expects to stumble across a cache of letters her mother wrote to her but never sent, which could hold the answers she seeks.

Haunting yet ultimately uplifting, Pieces…

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Walking Over Eggshells by Lucinda E. Clarke

Write-Escape

walking on eggshells

Walking Over Eggshells is a well-written poignant memoir about a woman’s struggle to hold onto her self-esteem while her narcissistic mother endlessly tries to tear it apart. Lucinda tells her story from her abusive and difficult childhood to her life with a betraying husband who leaves her poverty-stricken in a foreign country with two children.

Lucinda writes with brutal honesty about her home life and what it was like to suffer emotional and verbal abuse on a daily basis. Even after Lucinda married Jeremy, a charismatic, but cheating and irresponsible husband, her mother’s scoldings and put-downs never ceased. Lucinda had a painful life and even though her story is compelling and downright amazing, it is not an emotionally easy book to read.

However, despite her mother’s abuse and her husband’s betrayal Lucinda was able to reclaim her self-worth and become quite accomplished. Kudos to Lucinda. She sends a clear message…

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Mommie Dearest Darkly: Toni Morrison’s God Help the Child

Morrison’s latest book, God Help the Child, captivates me (even though I haven’t read it yet) because it deals with the subject of a not so great relationship between a mother and daughter, not to mention the fact that this was the title (except mine was God Bless the Child) that I had chosen for my upcoming memoir. Billy Holiday is saying a lot in her song.) The reviews, so far, are mixed, solidifying my belief that not everyone can relate to mothers who are not conventional–in a Hallmark kind of way, emotional abuse or the children, who eventually become adults, who bear the scars of unconventional parenting. Still, there are many who can. I chose this book as the selection for the month of June because this book, written by an well-known author, I believe can help people to understand the effect of emotional abuse on children, especially when it comes from a mother. The review below will give you a good feel for the book.

Patricia Lundy

Mommie Dearest tells the story of perhaps the most iconic inversion of what an ideal mother should be like: beautiful and successful on the surface, rotten on the inside. Yet perhaps other mothers damage more subtly, more terribly, even. At its essence, God Help the Child is about a woman’s reckoning with her childhood scars, and these scars ultimately stem from her mother’s rejection of her due to her dark black skin. Bride, the novel’s protagonist, is the beautiful, successful, materialistic executive of YOU, GIRL cosmetics. She only wears shades of white- creams, milks, and snows- to compliment her unforgettable blue-black skin. For someone who was never supposed to be gorgeous by her mother’s standards, Bride is stunning. And though her looks are admired by many, perhaps they’re most admired by herself. Like Joan Crawford, Bride’s mother, whom she is never allowed to call mother (instead she calls her Sweetness…

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Toni Morrison Talks New Book & Diversity In Literature In New York Times Magazine

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Penguin Random House is releasing Toni Morrison’s new book, God Help the Child, in April–Child Abuse Prevention Month. I love that her title is inspired by Billy Holiday’s God Bless the Child. I can already tell that this novel, about a mother-daughter relationship, is going to impact me just like a good memoir would.

Black America Web

At 84 years old, literary legend Toni Morrison has no intention of putting down her pen just yet.

The New York Times Magazine put the Nobel Prize winning-author on the cover of this week’s issue, and it ran a profile of her online. In the interview, Toni shares her thoughts on diversity in literature, her new novel “God Help The Child” (due out April 21), and how writing protects her.

Toni recalls wanting to fill a void in Black literature, which she felt wasn’t doing much to appeal to women in the community. However, she still found an interesting thread in the books that were available before she began her own illustrious writing career

“In so many earlier books by African-American writers, particularly the men, I felt that they were not writing to me. But what interested me was the African-American experience throughout whichever time I spoke of,” she told…

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