You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should have behaved better. ~Anne Lamott You Own Your Story #memoir

10 Comments

  1. HA! This is a goodie. 🙂

    1. Yes it is–one of my favorites.

  2. I love that. I read it a couple of years ago and it really encouraged me. Still, there is a limit. My parents, I have come to believe, did their best. It wasn’t good enough but it was their best. If I told my story, it would crush them. Yet somehow, it feels that the story is crushing me from the inside out. I’m not there yet.

    1. We’ve been taught (trained actually), both explicitly and implicitly, to not say or do anything that would embarrass or hurt our family’s feelings–that it’s our job to protect them (which is why, even as children, we won’t tell when our parents or other family members have hurt us) or we’re not being a good daughter. This sends a clear message to the child that we carry into adulthood–What other people may or may not think is more important than how we feel. This seems to be especially true for daughters that came of age in the sixties and seventies. It’s a brick wall that many are not able to get around. And that’s okay. Healing comes in different ways for survivors. The most important thing is that we’re true to ourselves–whatever that looks or feels like.

      1. Thank you. I identify with everything you say. Your words console and encourage me.

  3. Ha ha – love this.

    1. Me too! Thanks for stopping by.

  4. This is one of those favorite quotes, I kept in the front of my mind as I wrote and released my memoir. Just love Anne Lamott. Thanks for sharing this. 🙂 Alexis

  5. I am in the process of coming up with a curriculum to teach Writing as Healing to individuals with mental illness who are interested in writing memoir as part of their recovery. I love
    Anne’s quote and will keep it in mind as I continue to come up with my lesson plans.

    1. I absolutely love this quote too. Writing about my experience was painful and cathartic. I’m in the final edits of my memoir now, but I still come back to this quote every so often to remind myself that it’s okay to tell my story–that it is MY story.

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