National Child Abuse Prevention Month

Originally posted on Red Toenails:

logo-guideApril is National Child Abuse Prevention Month.  This month and throughout the year, the US government encourages all individuals and organizations to play a role in making all communities a better place for children and families.  By ensuring that parents have the knowledge, skills and resources they need to care for their children the National Child Abuse Prevention Month helps promote children’s social and emotional well-being and prevent child maltreatment within families and communities.

Research shows that when parents possess six protective factors, the risk for neglect and abuse diminish and optimal outcomes for children, youth, and families are promoted.  The six protective facts are:

Nurturing and attachment

Knowledge of parenting and of child and youth development

Parental resilience

Social connections

Concrete supports for parents

Social and emotional development well-being

April is a time to celebrate the important role that communties play in protecting children.  Everyone’s participation is critical.  Focusing…

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Why Memoirs are Special

Originally posted on Pearls Before Swine:

equipeng95“…it is difficult for those who publish their own memoirs to escape the imputation of vanity. Nor is this the only disadvantage under which they labor: it is also their misfortune, that whatever is uncommon is rarely, if ever, believed, and from what is obvious we are apt to turn away in disgust, and to charge the writer of it with impertinence.” – Gustavus Vass (Olaudah Equiano)

So, why do I want to tell my story? Why has the itch to spill the beans of my background always been with me? Some may call it a dream, but I call it a challenge. Of all the books I’ve written, writing my life story is one of my greatest challenges and I hope to conquer it real soon. I feel like I have not completely exhausted my writing endeavors until I have written a story of my life. I’ve danced with…

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The Liar’s Club by Mary Karr

Originally posted on The Book Girl:


The Liars’ Club is a brilliantly written memoir by Mary Karr about her tumultuous upbringing by an alcoholic mother and a largely absent father. I read this as part of my Southern Women Writers class (Karr is from Texas, though the sense of place in the book is not distinctly Southern. Not that I had any problem with that.)

Karr had a rough childhood and some parts of the memoir are hard to read. But Karr handles her struggles and traumatic experiences in a way that doesn’t romanticize them, but doesn’t punch you in the face with them either. She has a gritty, real, writing style that is incredibly appealing and a dark sense of humor that can make you smile even when the content you’re reading makes you cringe.

Like we said in class, no one wants to read about happy childhoods and happy endings, we like reading about…

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Writing Memoirs

Originally posted on Bookishpublishers's Blog:


9 Tips for Dealing with the Emotions When Writing a Memoir

Writing a memoir is much like going through your trunk of family treasures and keepsakes. At times the memories may be fuzzy, just like the ink on the pages of that 70-year-old journal your great-grandmother kept. Sometimes the memories may be painful, much like the ring your father gave you before he passed away. And sometimes the memories may be glorious, like the wedding dress you have stored safely, in hopes that your daughter may one day wear the family heirloom.

Due to the emotions that emerge in memoir writing, it is often necessary that the writer understand how to navigate and conquer the writing process, in spite of the added element of being taken for a ride on an emotional roller coaster each time one sits down to write. There are strategies writers can use to help ease…

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Narcissistic Personality Disorder in the Movie ‘Tangled': Mother Does Not Know Best

Originally posted on The Invisible Scar:

movie-theater [photo credit: Heritage Vancouver Society]

Editor’s Note: Upon reading this post, some readers may say, “Oh, ‘Tangled‘ is just a movie!” Indeed, “Tangled” is a movie, but not just one. Stories, whether in books or movies or television programs, teach us about ourselves, about what we value, about what we love, about what we hate. No “real-life Rapunzel” or “real-life Mother Gothel” may have existed, but for the myriad daughters with NPD mothers, the story itself is not too unlike their own stories.

* * *

Quick, name the cruelest Disney villain… Did you name Mother Gothel? As a parental figure with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), Mother Gothel rates high on the list for her twisted, abusive and relentless treatment of her “adopted” daughter, Rapunzel.

I recently re-watched “Tangled” and took note of the destructive NPD characteristics demonstrated by Mother Gothel. (Spoilers abound from this point on.)

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How to Market Your Self Published Books to Libraries!

Originally posted on iaiindependentpublishingblog:

If you are a self published author, your goal is to sell your work and  inevitably, see a return on your investment.  In order to do this, you must (wait for it…) market, market, market your product.   In an earlier post, I recommended that you mimic the big fish in order to be successful.  Well, how do big fish gain recognition and earn sales? They place their products everywhere?

Libraries are definitely good places to help you gain momentum as a self publishing superstar. As a professional librarian, I have had experience working in school, public, and academic libraries.  In the aforementioned role(s), I have had the tedious responsibility of maintaining library collections.  Although I love my career, maintaining a collection is a very cumbersome process.  For one, librarians are inundated by sales reps.  We have to select books that are appropriate for our respective libraries and that  requires a lot of…

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What’s it like living with a parent with Narcissism

Originally posted on narcandyou:

Narcissism runs in families for the most part. It’s very hard to live with a narcissistic family member. This generally keeps the victim trapped as when they move away from home, they aren’t always free of NPD sufferers as they will choose partners who have aspects of NPD or full-blown NPD. Even those individuals who go in the other direction and go towards an empathic person will not be entirely free as either the parent/s still control them (and now the empathic partner) or they display dysfunctional patterns and carry on the abuse from their parent/s with this new partner so they cycle continues until they themselves heal from the past.

So what is it like living with a narcissistic parent? Hell.

Here are some of the games a NPD parent (NP) plays with their scapegoat aka child :

  • Pitting siblings or children of close friends against each other. If…

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When is a Book Manuscript Ready to Send to Agents or Publishers?

Originally posted on Writer's Resource Blog:

Chuck Sambuchino, who writes for Writer’s Digest, offers three primary reasons why manuscripts are rejected by agents:

First…the story they’re reading is in a genre or category outside of what they handle. Form rejection. The second reason they say no is because of poor writing skills: grammar, punctuation, sentence structure, etc. Form rejection. The third and most common reason that good writers get rejected is that their story just plain isn’t ready yet. In other words, it’s good—but simply being good doesn’t cut it. A piece of fiction has to be great to catch an agent’s eye.

Each of these issues has a solution.

First, research the agent before submitting. There are a host of resources out there, including the annual guides to agents and book publishers. Always go to the agent’s website to look up information about that agent. While you’re there, check out their fellow agents to…

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Fly free from emotional abuse


As many of you know, April is Child Abuse Prevention Month. I reblogged this post from Galesmind because many survivors of emotional child abuse find themselves in emotionally abusive relationships as adults.

Originally posted on galesmind:

air balloon with heart

beware night mare

Emotional abuse is never ok. It can leave scars much deeper than any fist hitting flesh. The wounds are carried in the mind, heart and soul. People who are sensitive and caring are usually the victims. They are easy to manipulate because they really care about others. It often starts with the perpetrator putting the victim on a pedestal. When someone goes too fast claiming “love at first site” or something else it should give someone pause. It can happen but healthy relationships are built over time. Another red flag is “I love you so much I want you to myself.” If you plan things with other than the perpetrator they will make you feel guilty. Tell you that obviously you dont’ care about them. They should be enough. Slowly they will isolate you from people that care about you. You end up under their control completely. Sometimes they will…

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Memoir Writing: Scene, Summary, and Musing

Originally posted on WordServe Water Cooler:

Photo/KarenJordanWhat is a memoir? “I had to look up the definition of a memoir before I wrote my entry for this contest,” one writer confessed to me.

“Congratulations!” I responded, acknowledging her award.

This writer’s research paid off. Plus, she chose an inspiring, true story from her life, and she engaged her readers with a meaningful message using creative nonfiction techniques.

Being a judge of the contest entries, I also noticed that some of the other aspiring and experienced writers needed to do a little research before they wrote a memoir. So, I’m sharing here some of what I’ve learned as a memoirist.

My road to memoir writing started with enrolling in a class on writing for publication while in college. But I really didn’t hear the term “memoir” much until I took nonfiction writing classes a decade later.

One of my favorite professors at the University of Arkansas at…

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